So I’m sitting here working and I glance over at my notepad, upon which I’ve scribbled various to-do lists for my job. But it’s not a particular task that catches my eye, it’s this little thing floating isolated over in the corner, spanning two blue ruled lines. A note written in a loopy, awkward cursive script: “I could change.”
I could change.
It’s not a song lyric, and it’s not an admonition. I barely recall even writing it. I think it was something I did while suffering through talking to someone on the phone; my hand moving of its own accord. An artifact of my subconscious mind.
It’s a nice little reminder, too, as I grind through the rest of this day. I could change. I can change.
Not because I have to, but because I want to.
It’s comforting, in a way.
word…i don’t know why your posts always make me feel like i wanna spill my guts to your comments…ha…but isaiah and i were talking the other day after i had a (semi-regular, unfortunately) small panic session about how best friends have been divorced…soul mates, even…and he said that’s only because some people refuse to change…but it’s inevitable. i like this thought, lyn…a beautiful token for every day for sure..
Ah, Lyn! That’s how I make notes too, and that’s why I keep them.
I really, really hear you. It’s a powerful thought to just know that you could, even if you don’t right at this moment. The knowledge that you can is freeing.
a perfect note to have, a great reminder. nice post!
It sounds like you really have been listening to LCD Soundsystem.
Actually, wait. IT IS A SONG LYRIC. Holy shit. I didn’t think it was, but it is. Here I am making deep-thinking associations, and all my brain was doing was just repeating LCD Soundsystem lyrics to me.
Well, the song lyric is actually ‘I can change’ but close enough. And the sentiment is still on.
You still can.